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Dress For Success by Kaxen6 Dress For Success by Kaxen6
90% of Dictator Kax's plans are ill-thought out or involve destroying 90% of humanity or both.

It might be just a tad nonsensical for world domination aspirants to copycat Nazi fashion sense when the Nazis weren't actually that successful at world domination considering how long they lasted and how much they took... though they probably win the "snappy evil clothes" contest.

And as far as I remember, the Mongol Empire was the only world domination attempt in which Russia was at least partially conquered.

Most people screw up at Russia... because if they don't attack in winter, they get stuck until it is winter and then winter causes much failure.

One simply can't say "I conquered the world, except Russia"

Though if someone is channeling Simo Hayha, I'd be scared to try to take down Finland...

Though Mongols have pretty bad History PR, they always get written off as moronic barbarians despite the fact they conquered so much stuff and held it for so long. And I've only seen like three Mongol documentaries... and one was just about their horsies...

And the Mongols had badass women.

For some reason I will consider almost anything slightly more highly if women in combat (and not Sweet Polly Oliver stuff) is present... Ironically, I have no desires to join the military and get a combat position.


...I'm bad at drawing Mongol clothes... it doesn't say Mongolian precisely...
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:iconcaptainface:
Captainface Featured By Owner Apr 20, 2014
Reminds me of the Crash Course Meme
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:iconhydracorinthian:
HydraCorinthian Featured By Owner Aug 4, 2010  Student General Artist
Alexander the Great and the Romans conquered a lot that side of the world a LONG time ago
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:iconhemophobianessticity:
hemophobianessticity Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2010
Eh, I thought it was Mongolian attire so no worries. xD
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:iconblack-minx:
bLack-mInx Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2010
Good ol' General Winter X3

Channeling the god Simo would not go good for whoever he's fighting X3

The mongols and all the other steppe tribes were flippin' sweet. Didja know that some had green eyes and such? They had immigrants from the Germanic and Russian tribes that melted in with them. And they had drugs and cool tattoos. <3
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:iconkaxen6:
Kaxen6 Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2010   General Artist
I knew about that.

That was the topic of one of the few documentaries on Mongols I've seen. Something to do with the Amazons/what may have been the basis of the Greeks' stories about the Amazons moving to Mongolia... I'm not sure if that makes a lick of sense...

Ever since I learned that the Amazons from Greek stories were not in fact from the Amazon Rainforest as a small child, I felt intensely annoyed. xD
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:iconblack-minx:
bLack-mInx Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2010
Oh, that's really cool. What was the name of it, do you remember? I'd really like to see that.
....I'm such an incurable nerd =_='
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:iconkaxen6:
Kaxen6 Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2010   General Artist
Secrets of the Dead: Amazon Warrior Women or something along that line.
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:iconblack-minx:
bLack-mInx Featured By Owner Feb 4, 2010
thanks ^^
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:iconpandarune:
pandarune Featured By Owner Jan 30, 2010
Hmmm...if Russia's greatest defense is winter, does that mean Canadians could conquer them?
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:iconkaxen6:
Kaxen6 Featured By Owner Jan 30, 2010   General Artist
I'm convinced Canada is secretly plotting our doom because we'd never expect it! :<
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:iconpandarune:
pandarune Featured By Owner Jan 31, 2010
Now that you've discovered our secret plan, the Polar Bear ninjas will have to silence you. :ninja:
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:iconvuther:
Vuther Featured By Owner Jan 30, 2010
She's on to us!

And Simo Hayha is the most awesome dude, ever.
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:iconinfinitefruit:
InfiniteFruit Featured By Owner Jan 29, 2010  Hobbyist General Artist
Funny, the first thing I thought of was "Mongolian" when I saw it. X]

...In that case, I'm dressing up like Napoleon Buonaparte.
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:iconty-ping:
ty-ping Featured By Owner Jan 29, 2010
Yea the Mongols get a bad rap considering when they took over China was when they made China to be the intellectual paradise that the Europeans then turned around and ripped off left right and center. But everyone forgets that part, remembers what happened after the Mongols lost control and the Chinese built a big wall which may have protected them from the Mongols, but did nothing to prevent the bankruptcy of the country and the take over by the Manchurians.
Oh History, your so silly.
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:iconty-ping:
ty-ping Featured By Owner Jan 29, 2010
shit... "You're so silly" D:
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:iconaquaticmage13:
Aquaticmage13 Featured By Owner Jan 29, 2010
all i have to say is LMAO!
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:iconmarikbentusi:
MarikBentusi Featured By Owner Jan 29, 2010
Nobody can conquer Russia. Nature is its ally. :XD:
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:iconordoncrane:
OrdonCrane Featured By Owner Jan 29, 2010
I have a Mars Attacks book written from the point of view of mongols. They scared the crap out of the aliens and killed a load of 'em. But got beaten when a giant laser melted the section of the Great Wall that they were on.
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:iconraziel1981:
raziel1981 Featured By Owner Jan 29, 2010
You dont need an army to take down Russia you just need a few assassins
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:iconjaegerofice:
Jaegerofice Featured By Owner Jan 29, 2010
Only reason why mongols failed to conguer russia was when a Ogotai-khan died, the leading general turned his army around to go pay respects for the dead khan. If he would have continued, Novgorod would have fallen and after that rest of europe. If however DK attemps to conguer russia, she should consult first those who know of winter warfare.

Also I'd suggest to target first the ones that most likely will be hard to conguer later on. This way they are unprepared and can be converted to be part of her forces.
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:iconkaxen6:
Kaxen6 Featured By Owner Jan 29, 2010   General Artist
Yeah... if he didn't die, maybe Europe would be speaking Mongolian...
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:iconjaegerofice:
Jaegerofice Featured By Owner Jan 29, 2010
well according to some fenno-ugrians originally imigrated around mongolia so I am not sure if it would be bad thing though the new world might have not been explored so soon.
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:iconspartan-3x13:
spartan-3x13 Featured By Owner Jan 28, 2010
Once again this little topic about mongol women holding high ranking positions in the military and government came up on Cracked/ wherever you read it. XD I guess that article had a lot of comedy fuel huh?
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:iconkaxen6:
Kaxen6 Featured By Owner Jan 28, 2010   General Artist
I never had an excuse to bring up Mongol women until now.
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:iconspartan-3x13:
spartan-3x13 Featured By Owner Jan 28, 2010
I'm sure it's more of an opportunity to bring them up. A very funny opportunity.
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:iconazncelly:
AZNcelly Featured By Owner Jan 28, 2010  Student Interface Designer
I agree. Your description makes me feel like I gained 1000 nerve cells, or more.
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:iconholy-sparks:
Holy-Sparks Featured By Owner Jan 28, 2010  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I feel enlightened :D
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:iconvae-halo3:
Vae-Halo3 Featured By Owner Jan 28, 2010
I like reading your artist's description for your works; I end up getting a history lesson out of it, and I enjoy it. xP;; xD Of course, your humor always shines though.
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:iconkaxen6:
Kaxen6 Featured By Owner Jan 28, 2010   General Artist
I'd want to be history teacher if I could talk a school into having "History Trivia" as a history course. :lmao:
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